


Deal with a Prince of Hell

by ChopinWorshipper



Series: My beloved nemesis - My significant bother [3]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Asmodeus Being an Asshole, Asmodeus and Raphael have a weird relationship, Asmodeus is BEYOND frightening, Asmodeus is pissed off, Asmodeus trying to get under Michael's skin, Azrael and Michael share the brain cell, Azrael is the Angel of Death, Blood and Violence, Brutal Murder, Gen, God wants Michael to learn some diplomacy, Hate/Love/Hate, I'm Going to Hell, Kinda, Michael has to be diplomatic, Minor Character Death, Mostly it's really just hate, Possessive Behavior, Raphael gets hurt, Raphael is also worried, She/Her Pronouns for Azrael, The Archangels are worried, Ze/Zir Pronouns for Asmodeus, angel blood is called ichor here, but also protective in zir evil possessive way, cooperation between heaven and hell, michael is just done, they/them pronouns for uriel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 06:15:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 13,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27069979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChopinWorshipper/pseuds/ChopinWorshipper
Summary: The Archangel Raphael gets wounded and the fellow Archangels are furious - in their angelic way, of course. But God doesn't allow them to smite anyone this time. Instead He sends Michael to persuade Raphael's nemesis Asmodeus to punish the attackers, as they're under zir jurisdiction. Michael quickly figures out that diplomacy and negotiation are a wholly different kind of battle than what he is used to.
Relationships: Aeshma | Ashmedai | Asmodeus/Lilit | Lilith (Abrahamic Religions), Past Lucifer/Michael, Past Raphael/Asmodeus
Series: My beloved nemesis - My significant bother [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2148942
Kudos: 8





	1. The wounded Archangel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Archangel Raphael shows up to a meeting severely wounded and the other Archangels freak out a little.

In spite of being a warrior, Archangel Michael was actually extremely slow to anger.

He was courageous and strong, but also long-suffering and merciful.

To hold his hand over mankind, dispel fear and despair, give strength to the brave and fight the forces of darkness, that was his work assigned by the Lord God Almighty.

Anger was blinding and deluding. A feeling unbecoming of the Leader of all Angels.

When he exacted the Wrath of God, it wasn't his own.

However, there were times, when he did feel wrathful, though it was extremely rare.

Today had been a normal day, until Michael had summoned the other Archangels for a meeting to discuss the tasks for the next month.

None of the Archangels had ever failed to follow the summoning.

So Michael felt uneasy, when only Gabriel, Uriel and (to his great surprise) Azrael attended.

“Where is Raphael?”, he demanded to know.

The Archangels exchanged uncomfortable glances and Azrael was frowning ominously.

Raphael – sweet, dutiful and soothing little Raphael – was _missing_.

“We don't know where he is”, Gabriel admitted worriedly.

_Oh no …_

Suddenly there was a light tap on the door.

Michael went to open it, only to come face to face with Raphael. His alarm bells went off as soon as he saw how eerily wan the younger Archangel was.

“Sorry I'm late”, Raphael gasped, “I …” And proceeded to collapse into Michael's arms.

“Raphael!”, the other Archangels cried and ran up to them.

Gabriel blanched, when he caught sight something; from a hole right below the wings, a golden liquid was trickling down Raphael's back. “Ichor! Oh Lord Almighty, he's wounded!”

Michael followed his sibling's glance and felt a light sickness pool in his stomach. But he forced himself to calm down and ordered Uriel to take off his red coat and spread it on the floor.

Carefully the warrior Archangel put his brother down onto the cloak, so he could inspect the wound.

Now, that he had a closer look, Michael frowned: “This is demonic work. Likely caused by a flaming sword forged from Hellfire.”

“Hellfire!”, Uriel cried, “Hellfire is lethal for angels!”

“He's not going to die”, Azrael spoke calmly, “He came here just in time. Step aside, Michael, and leave this to me.”

It was ironic that Azrael, Angel of Death, vessel of the great Destroyer herself, She who brought mortal souls to rest, would be the one to save Raphael's life, but she put her hand onto the wound and within seconds the demonic essence left Raphael's corporation, manifesting as a black flame in Azrael's hand, before vanishing. She had obliterated the Hellfire, like it never had existed in the first place.

“Now you can heal him, Michael; you're almost as adept in the healing arts as he is.”

Michael followed the instruction. A prayer to God later the wound closed, as if by itself.

“Now we need to take Raphael to his quarters”, Azrael said to the others, “He may be healed now, but he still needs to rest for a few days. It speaks for his strength, that he survived this wound and made it all the way back to Heaven. We'll ask who did this, when he wakes up.”

Michael picked the unconscious Raphael up and carried him, while the others followed closely behind him, debating about who the culprit was.

“Only a Prince of Hell could have done this!”, Uriel hissed. “I bet it was Asmodeus! Ze is his greatest opponent, hates him with a passion and also is extremely cunning and powerful, so who else-?”

“You're losing that bet”, Azrael interrupted her sibling. “Had Asmodeus managed to wound Raphael like this, ze would never have passed up on the chance of destroying him. And neither would the other Princes. No. It must have been a lower ranking demon, who could go undetected more easily. They ambushed Raphael when he was distracted, that's the only explanation for how they could literally stab him in the back. Probably they were too scared of our retribution to finish him off. So they skedaddled and hoped that Raphael would succumb to his wound and be destroyed.”

“We will ask Raphael later”, Michael repeated Azrael's words from earlier, before this could grow into a heated debate.

“And once we know”, Uriel insisted, “We will get the culprit's sorry ass and smite them so hard that other demons won't dare to even whisper our names for many centuries to come!”

“To exact judgement and retribution is the right of the Most High alone”, Michael scolded, “We are his tools and messengers and in no position to judge, question or act without the will of the Lord. Now compose yourself.”

Uriel saw their error and nodded. “Still, it sickens me to the core”, they mumbled, “The thought that someone could hurt him like this – and a lowly demon at that!”

Michael didn't admit, that he felt the same way, but Gabriel obviously did. Azrael on the other hand remained as calm and neutral as ever, as could be expected from the vessel of none other than Death herself.

“I shall take my leave now”, she said, “You three take care of your sibling. I will report to the Almighty, that one of His Archangels has been hurt.”

Azrael spread her black wings and flew away, bearing her ever present scythe.


	2. Raphael's account

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael tells his siblings what happened and Azrael reveals God's decision on the matter to them. Azrael is hogging the brain cell, Michael decides to go to Hell and Raphael gives advice and information. Also, if parts of this chapter look slashy to you, be assured they're not.

When Raphael awoke, he heard low whispering.

At first his sight was quite blurry, but soon he could make out glimpses of yellow, blue and red.

A soft moan alerted his visitors, that he was awake.

“Raphael! Oh praise to the Lord!” The voice of Gabriel.

Now the younger Archangel's sight cleared and he recognised Michael, Gabriel and Uriel.

“You really scared us back there”, Gabriel chided.

Raphael blushed with shame and glanced aside. “I'm sorry”, he whispered.

The other Archangels exchanged frowning glances.

“Sorry for what?”, Gabriel asked confusedly, “ _You're_ the one who got stabbed, what do you have to apologise for?!”

“I failed!”, Raphael choked. “I failed as an Archangel! What good am I, if a low-ranking demon can take me by surprise and literally stab me in the back?! Being so weak, that's what I'm sorry for!”

“Raphael, listen to me”, Michael spoke and sat by his sibling's bedside. “You're not weak. You're one of the most valuable assets Heaven has."

“Valuable asset!”, Raphael echoed, “An Archangel shouldn't have been defeated so easily!”

“Who is saying anything about defeat?”, Michael retorted. “You'll be fine within a week and we will handle the rest. Everything will be alright.”

“But …”

“No. You are the one through whom God heals¹. You're the Archangel of healing, because you were always meant to heal wounds of body and soul, to dispel pain and sorrow – you're a healer, not a warrior. Never once have you failed to fulfil that purpose. Yet you also never failed to overcome the most powerful of demons. I mean, would you say that Asmodeus and Azazel are small fry?”

Raphael chuckled: “No.”

Asmodeus and Azazel were anything but 'small fry', as Michael had so eloquently put it.

Asmodeus, a former Seraph and now Prince of Lust, had always been extremely powerful and highly intelligent.

Azazel, although not quite as powerful, was extremely manipulative and seductive.

They were both very strong in their own right and neither had ever gone down without a fight. Even though Azazel was now bound in a special part of Hell. Asmodeus on the other hand had been bound several times, but the Prince of Lust was too strong to be chained permanently (at least by any other than the Almighty).

Michael went on: “The reason that little demon could wound you, was _because_ he's a low-rank demon. You have been known to vanquish powerful Archdemons and those are the foes you're used to. There was no way you could have predicted, that one little weasel could even dare to assault you, while you're minding your own business.”

“Exactly”, Uriel now spoke up, “And you're still strong and mighty; most other angels would have died from such a wound, before managing to return to Heaven to get treatment, but you! You dragged yourself all the way back up through the many spheres! Speaking of which, how did you do it?”

Raphael smiled: “Honestly? I don't know. Probably pure obstinacy and the Will of God.”

The other Archangels chuckled.

Michael grinned: “There's the Raphael I know: the smiling sweetheart, who spreads healing warmth wherever he goes, whom Our Father, us angels and the humans love.”

“Even with my sentimentality?”, Raphael laughed.

“God made you this way”, Michael pointed out. “It would go against His Will to not love you the way you are.”

Just as he had finished his sentence, the door opened.

Raphael's eyes widened, when the Angel of Death came into the room.

“Greetings, Azrael”, he addressed her. “I faintly remember you being there, before I passed out.”

Azrael nodded affirmatively.

Raphael observed how uneasy the others grew around her. As the vessel of Death herself, Azrael just had that effect on others, though she didn't mean to. But he, in his function as a healer, had faced her way too often to still feel the same unease.

“Welcome back, Archangel Raphael”, she said and closed the door behind her. “How are you feeling?”

“A bit woozy”, Raphael admitted.

“That's no wonder”, Azrael remarked. “The demonic essence was inside your body for a whole week, before I removed and destroyed it, so Michael could heal the damage.”

“I see. Thank you for your help, then.”

“You're welcome. Will you tell us what exactly happened?”

The younger Archangel groaned: “I was leaving my pharmacy for my earthly home, when someone ripped my bag off of my arm. As I pursued the thief, I recognised him to be a demon in disguise. I chased after him into a dark alley, where – oh so predictably – I was assaulted by a group of about thirty demons. They came at me with flaming blades, Hellfire and such. I smote about thirteen of them, before one got lucky with a throwing knife, right between my wings. The pain was _maddening_ – I think I destroyed three more demons in my fury. The rest scrammed. I needed a whole week to drag myself all the way back up here, because of the Hellfire poisoning. And that's it.”

“Do you think Asmodeus could have ordered a hit on you?”, Uriel pried.

Raphael shook his head. “No, ze wouldn't have allowed that. Ze wants to kill me zirself, ze says that all the time. While they were definitely from the Second Circle, this was an unsanctioned assault. Maybe they wanted to please their Prince by presenting zir my head on a silver plate or something. That's never gonna happen.” He chuckled: “Ze'll be _furious_ , when ze finds out.”

The other Archangels nodded.

“Thank you, that narrows it down a little”, Gabriel stated, before turning to Azrael: “You have spoken to the Almighty. What does He say?”

“This: Raphael is to rest for another week, then resume his duties as always. Fret no longer, Raphael, for God loves you, who never failed to be humble and kind to all. As for you three”, she turned to the other Archangels, “Hold your temper, all of you. The Creator has given me the name of the culprits. And He too wishes for justice to be served.”

“By us?”, asked Uriel hopefully.

To everyone's surprise, Azrael shook her head. “No. The exacter of the Lord's justice shall be the one, who has claimed Raphael for zir own.”

“But that's Asmodeus!”, Raphael exclaimed.

The others stared at him.

“What does 'claimed Raphael as zir own' even mean?”, Michael questioned.

Before the Archangel in question could answer, Gabriel clarified: “It means that Asmodeus has called dibs on killing him. No one but zir is allowed to lay hand on Raphael, because ze wants to have the satisfaction of revenge all to zirself. Beelzebub has a similar thing going on with me.”

“Charming”, Michael deadpanned. “To choose you as their revenge kills to be. Maybe I should ask Lucifer, if he has a similar attitude towards me. Anyway, what were you going to say, Azrael?”

Azrael told him that Asmodeus didn't know yet what had happened. “So the Lord wants one of you to go down to the Second Circle of Hell and persuade zir ( _persuade_! Not threaten or force!) to unleash zir wrath on those who did it – and only _one_ of you”, she added, when the Archangels grew excited.

She and Raphael rolled their eyes in annoyance, when the other Archangels began to argue amongst each other.

“I will go”, Michael stated, “I'm the leader of Heaven's host and it's my responsibility.”

“But I am more eloquent than you!”, Gabriel argued, “If anyone can persuade Asmodeus, it's me!”

“Please, Gabriel! As if you could even get as far as to Asmodeus' circle! The closest thing you ever got to fighting was to turn the Nephilim against each other before the Great Flood! But _I_ guard the Gates of Hell”, Uriel pointed out. “I know the place and its inhabitants! I should be the one to go!”

“Enough!”, Raphael snapped, startling everyone.

“I want _none_ of you three to go! Gabriel is too clueless about the ways of Hell, Uriel is too undiplomatic and _you_ , Michael, don't know Asmodeus at all! Azrael, can't _you_ go? You're calm, level-headed, eloquent _and_ the vessel of Death herself! You would be perfect …”

“I have no time for these things, Raphael”, Azrael declined. “Nor is it my job. Michael is the strongest and the hardest to impress. If anyone other than you can interact with the Prince of Lust, it's him.”

Raphael nodded, but he still felt uneasy.

Azrael handed Michael a list of names and a warrant directly from God, then saw herself out.

“Michael, can I speak to you alone?”, Raphael requested.

Michael glared at the other two and they left.

Once alone, the warrior Archangel hugged his sibling and cradled him in his arms.

“Don't worry so much, Raphael”, he cooed. “Ze can't be worse than Lucifer, can ze?”

“It's not that”, Raphael sighed. “I know you can fight zir, but this isn't about battle or fighting. This is about wit and diplomacy. Asmodeus isn't like Lucifer.”

“Enlighten me then”, Michael requested, while stroking the Healer's curly hair. “The more I know, the better.”

Raphael leaned into the soothing hand (the hand that had defeated Lucifer himself) and described his nemesis' character: “Ze became the Prince of Lust after killing the original one. Ze is exceedingly volatile, unscrupulous and cruel, yet just as seductive as someone in zir position should be: charming and silver-tongued, like zir brother Lucifer. That's all they have in common, however. Asmodeus _isn't_ like Lucifer, ze learns from zir mistakes. Ze is intelligent, pragmatic, calculating and extremely manipulative. No one can get under one's skin quite like Asmodeus can – speaking from experience. If you have a weakness or a pressure point, ze will find it and take advantage of it. Ze is really curious too, so if something piques zir interest … well, you get the idea. That's about it. Just … take care of yourself down there, Michael.”

“Hey there”, the warrior Archangel chuckled, “If I didn't know better, I'd say you have no faith in me!”

“That's not it, it's just …”

“Trust me and the Lord”, Michael told him and kissed his forehead. “You rest and get better, after all you've been through in the past week. I'll be fine, Raphael. Don't forget who I am and always have been.”

Raphael felt his face flush.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) Raphael literally means "God heals" in Hebrew.


	3. Michael descends to Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael makes his way to Asmodeus' evil lair and terrifies a few demons along the way. At the same time he also learns that some can't be impressed that easily and that sometimes, even demons are entitled to politeness.

Michael said his due praises and prayers, before descending to the bottom of Creation.

When he came to its gates, he encountered Abaddon, the Angel of the Abyss¹.

“Are you substituting for Uriel?”, he inquired. “Last time I checked, you were responsible for keeping an eye on the Watchers.”

“I am substituting for Uriel”, Abaddon confirmed. “I'll return to the Abyss I come from, when they return. And what are you doing here, Leader of Heaven's Army?”

“Business”, Michael clipped and presented his permit.

The Angel of the Abyss nodded and opened the Gate to the Vestibule of Hell.

“Watch your back down there, Archangel”, he warned, “The damned madly crave the Light of God. And the demons have been particularly antsy lately.”

“I know”, Michael nodded. Then he entered this place, where he, for all fighting and smiting of demons, had never been to before.

In the Vestibule, he encountered the souls of those who had been too cowardly to choose between Good and Evil and now were plagued by all kinds of vermin. The fog there was so thick, that he needed a bit to find the Gate to the First Circle, but he did and found himself in Limbo.²

The virtuous nonbelievers fell on their knees and oohed and aahed at the sight of the Archangel. Their longing glances didn't escape Michael.

As he drew near to the Second Circle, he encountered Belphegor, the Prince of Sloth, who was ruling over both the Vestibule and the First Circle and apparently inspecting his territory.

When Belphegor saw Michael, he groaned: “Nooo, not one of you _Clouddancers_! I just finished my walk! Oh Satan, I thought my day couldn't get any worse!”

The Archangel was way too agitated to tolerate this nonsense, grabbed the Archdemon by the robe and lifted him up.

“One more comment like that”, Michael snarled, “And Astaroth will have your position to herself again! Now, tell me how I get to the Gate of the Second Circle!”

“Th-thi-this way!”, Belphegor squeaked.

“Coward”, Michael grumbled in revulsion, but let the other go and continued his quest.

When he came to the Second Circle at last, the demons trembled at the sight of him.

“Open the Gates!”, he commanded. “I'm not here to smite anyone, but I will, if you provoke me.”

They scrambled to fulfil the Archangel's demand, though the very emanation of his sheer power almost forced them onto their knees.

“Thank you. Now scram.”

As soon as he entered the Circle, he was assaulted by icy, hurricane force winds and unfolded his enormous six wings to shield himself.

After just a few metres, he was approached by a tall, elegant demon.

“We need to see your permit to enter here”, she spoke boldly, though the Archangel could tell she was uncomfortable.

Michael showed her the divine warrant and looked her over, as the demon scanned the text.

This was not one of the fallen angels, but it was a second generation demon – likely one of Asmodeus' own children.

“Take me to your Prince”, he ordered.

The Incubus³ looked up from the paper with subdued irritation. “While I know who you are, you can't give me orders around here, Archangel. It doesn't matter who you are in Heaven, here in Hell we work by different rules.”

For a second Michael felt a little awkward, as well as really aggravated at the disrespect. But the demon did have a point. Though to Michael's defence, he had never actually been obliged to be polite to a demon before (what with him being a soldier and all).

“I'm sorry, my bad. Would you please be so courteous as to lead me to Prince Asmodeus to do my assigned business with zir?”

The Incubus smiled suavely: “Better. Follow me.”

While they crossed through the Second Circle, Michael had to dodge a few damned souls, who were blown about like leaves in the icy storm. He shuddered at their anguished wails and screams.

Soon they reached a black palace (how cliché).

“My fath- zir Highness's office is right above the throne room, in the centre of the palace. But this place is a mace, so getting there will take a while”, the Incubus informed him and Michael nodded.

The Archangel could feel the influence of Asmodeus grow stronger the nearer they drew; a baleful presence with a heavy pressure and a weird heat, tickling him and trying to get under his skin.

By the time they reached the door to Asmodeus' office, it had grown physically uncomfortable. Raphael had warned him, that the Prince's aura acted on its own, that it spread far and affected everyone within vicinity – just like Lucifer's and Satan's. The pulsating emanations gave Michael a faint nausea.

His guide knocked twice and from the inside a gentle, androgynous voice answered: “Enter”.

The Incubus went in first and informed the other person of Michael's arrival.

“Well, show him in then”, the voice commanded, slightly impatient.

The demon came back out and gestured for the Archangel to go inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) Abaddon means "Destruction" in Hebrew and is the name of a place in the underworld, where the damned are punished. It's the bottomless pit, where Satan and his followers will be incarcerated following Armageddon, but it's also the name of the angel in charge of it, hence the epithet "Angel of the Abyss". He's said to be in charge of an army of monstrous-looking locusts. Sources vary on who exactly that angel is. I headcanon, that God created an angel from the abyss, named him after the place and gave him the key to watch over it.  
> 2) Limbo is traditionally the place, where "virtuous heathens" would go, people who had lived a virtuous life or just had died with no other guilt than not having been baptised. Some people believed that unbaptised children would also go there, but this view was contested even from the early Middle Ages, on account of them being innocent babies. The Catholic Church established a few decades ago, that unbaptised children have a place in Paradise. In fact, the very concept of the Limbo was never included into the official canon, but obviously it has always been an influencial and popular idea, ever since it was first conceived.  
> 3) If you're stumbling over the Incubus being a female, the reason is that incubus derives from the Latin word "incubare" ("to lie on"). So, despite the tradition that Incubi are always male, it would technically be more accurate to say they're always tops, regardless of gender. In kind, Succubi are always bottoms, when you go by that logic, since "succumbere" means "to lie beneath" in Latin.


	4. Talking to the Prince of Lust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asmodeus has a lot to say.

Asmodeus was sitting behind zir desk surrounded by considerable stacks of paper.

Ze was … honestly, Michael wasn't sure, what he had expected the Prince of Lust to look like.

But one thing was for sure, he had _not_ expected a creature with three different heads (a bull's, a ram's and a slightly distorted human visage), floating purple hair and claws almost as long as the bony fingers they belonged to.

Still, he had to pull himself together. After all, a monstrous appearance was no reason to be rude.

“Hello, Asmodeus”, he greeted zir.

“Michael”, ze returned (zir smooth, seductive and feminine voice contrasting zir appearance).

The Archdemon's glowing red eyes (all of them) wandered over the Archangel's armour and weapons.

“I come in peace”, Michael assured zir.

“Sure, that's why you're armed to the teeth”, Asmodeus remarked sarcastically.

“Well, sorry for considering that coming here would be dangerous”, he retorted. “Also, could you change your appearance? I don't know which of your heads to talk to and it's irritating.”

The Prince of Lust snickered, but did him the courtesy. One snap of zir clawed fingers later and Michael was facing an attractive, well-endowed blonde woman with unnaturally turquoise eyes wearing a burgundy business suit.

“Better?”

“Yes, thank you.”

“You're welcome, but if _this_ puts you off, however do you talk to the Cherubim?”

That made him feel incredibly awkward, because with the Cherubim he often had the exact same problem.

“Well, let's forget about that. So, Michael …” Ze leaned back in zir chair, “… what brings you to my humble abode? If this is about Ornias again, I already told Uriel – wait, what happened to your hair?!”

Michael had taken off his helmet, revealing that the right half of his head was shorn.

“Just a little prank by Gabriel”, he muttered.

Asmodeus chortled: “Nice hair style, Archangel. Very … _rebellious_!”

“Hilarious”, he grumbled. “Anyway, I have come, because of this.”

He threw his warrant and a list onto the table.

Asmodeus read the warrant and arched an eyebrow. “You received your permit to come here directly from God?”

“Of course.”

The Prince of Lust nodded and added zir signature and seal to confirm that Michael had shown up. Pure formality.

“Still, that doesn't explain _why_ you're here”, ze said. “Only that it's extremely important. Then again, I could tell the moment you entered my Circle – and yes, I could feel it”, ze added, “My aura spreads throughout the entire Second Circle of Hell. Now, what is so urgent that God sends _you_ of all angels to come here to consult _me_?”

Michael decided to cut to the chase: “Archangel Raphael has been assaulted by a large group of demons.”

“And? How is that any of my business?”

That response caught him off guard. “Well … uhh …”

Asmodeus sighed: “Michael, I'm the Prince of Lust. Punishing violence or assault is not my job, unless it's of sexual nature. If you want punishment for violence against the divine, go to the Seventh Circle.”

Michael frowned: “That's where blasphemous _souls_ get punished. I just told you, that the attack was committed by _demons_ – demons from _your_ Circle”, he added pointedly. “So I'm afraid this _is_ your business. Speaking of which, you wouldn't happen to have known about it?”

Zir turquoise eyes grew hard. “Michael, if you're accusing me of sanctioning or even ordering a hit on Raphael, you're wrong. I know better than to assume that a bunch of mook demons would get the job done. If I actually wanted Raphael to die, I would finish him off myself.”

“God may grant, that you'll never accomplish that!”, Michael growled.

“Whatever”, the Archdemon brushed him off. “Bottom line is, I have nothing to do with it. I didn't even know, until you told me. When was that incident?”

“A week ago. Raphael needed a whole week to get back to Heaven, because of the injuries-”

“Wait a minute! Did I hear that right, they actually managed to wound him?! How???”

Michael inhaled sharply, before explaining: “It was a group of about thirty demons, namely those on the list. One of them got lucky and managed to literally stab him in the back.”

“Oho!”, Asmodeus exclaimed. “But he is alive, isn't he?”

“Yes, but he almost almost died.”

“Good. He deserves to suffer for a change.”

Michael wasn't sure what offended him more, zir indifferent demeanour or zir words.

“No, Raphael does _not_ deserve that!”, he spat. “These demons assaulted him out of nowhere and wounded him gravely. They are your subjects and if you won't punish them, I will! And I'm not as nice as Raphael!”

For a second Asmodeus' expression froze.

Then zir left eye began to twitch and the temperature in the room dropped so rapidly, that the Archangel suppressed a shudder.

“Nice?”, ze echoed and Michael realised, that he had dropped a brick.

Asmodeus dropped the businesslike facade and jumped up.

“ _Nice!_ ”, ze hissed, “That little bastard flung me into Hell so hard, it left me with a permanent limp! Chained me to the bottom of the Red Sea for almost a thousand years, full knowing that I was hydrophobic! And why? Because I had been doing my job and in the process grew attached to Sarah! Alright, so I did kill her first seven husbands, but what of it? They had it coming!”¹

Michael held his spear a little tighter, but stated calmly: “I will not argue with you about your phobias or the fate of humans I never knew. It's none of my business.”

“I'm not done yet! There was that one time he threatened to chain me to the deepest bottom of the Mariana Trench, which is almost eleven kilometres under water! And then there is Asasel. All he did was teach humans about warfare and metalwork … and didn't Raphael imprison him in Dudael, under a pile of rocks, so that he may never see the sun again? Wow, what a _nice and sweet_ little Archangel! Don't you just want to hug him! You're not a Fallen! You have never been on the receiving end of his so-called niceness! I don't care, if he was acting on God's orders, that doesn't make it hurt any less! By Satan, I can't wait for the day, when that little Archangel suffers – suffers by _my_ hand! If I die afterwards, then so be it! I will get my revenge, if it's the last thing I do!”

Wow.

Seemed like Asmodeus had just waited to say that to someone's face.

Michael wasn't sure what to do with that.

With Lucifer he had it easier. Sure, when the two met, there would always be taunting on Lucifer's part, but then they would duke it out, no further talk, no questions asked. It was that simple.

But this …

Asmodeus seemed to notice his plight, for ze snorted: “You've never been talked to like that before, have you?”

“No”, Michael admitted.

“Thought as much.”

Then to his surprise, ze resumed zir detached smile. “Do forgive my outburst. My general mood hasn't been the best today. What were you saying?”

“Oh yeah – God has asked me (via Azrael) to come here and ask you this: that you exact your own justice on those, who-”

“And if I refuse?”

Now Michael was the angry one. “You would dare to go against the orders of the Most High?!”

Asmodeus chuckled: “Of course, that's how I fell! I was sick of being a slave and blindly following orders and the Fall, terrible as it was, freed me. I owe God nothing more, nor do I have anything to say to Him. As for my dear nemesis Raphael … if I'm on speaking terms with him, it's because he treats me with the due respect. That doesn't mean I owe him anything.”

The Archangel forced himself to take a few deep breaths, before he made another blunder. Still he couldn't help but pinch his nose in frustration.

“Asmodeus … why can't you just cooperate?”

“Michael, I fear you don't understand. Some of the demons on this list are my dear children. Through God's will a hundred of my children with Lilith die each day, just because they are hers.² It's only natural, that I love those who survive just the more. Besides, Raphael didn't go down without a fight, did he? The list says that he smote sixteen of his attackers (among them seven of my children), of which there were thirty-one. If my darlings didn't know not to mess with an Archangel before, they do now. But I love my children (all 2,191,493 of them) and I will _not_ lay a hand on any of them, nor will I allow any of _you_ to, just because your _silly little Archangel_ failed to watch his back.”

Those words made Michael relax just a little: for all his fierceness, he was first and foremost a being of divine love. Asmodeus' care for zir children was something he could understand and work with.

“You don't have to.”

“Come again?”

Michael clarified: “Not all of the surviving demons are your children, right? You can make an example on those who aren't. Like you said, if the rest of them didn't know not to mess with my siblings before, they do now. That would just reinforce it.”

While the Archdemon considered that, zir mood seemed to improve to the point of the room temperature becoming more comfortable.

That encouraged Michael to continue: “Besides, you would also do yourself a favour.”

Asmodeus raised a questioning brow. “Explain yourself.”

So the Archangel did: “You have staked a claim on Raphael, that he would be yours to kill.”

“That's correct.”

“Well, then what would stop you – one of the most evil and powerful demons of Hell – from asserting your claim by punishing those who dare to touch what you perceive as yours? Without your permission or even knowledge, no less!”

The Prince grinned deviously. “Why, you sly Archangel! How unscrupulous to use my pride and possessiveness to your advantage!” A snicker. “But you're not getting me that easily.”

“That much is clear. What are your conditions?” Michael couldn't believe he was asking this.

The Prince of Lust shrugged casually and named zir conditions: that ze would be allowed to come to Heaven for a bit and pay Raphael a sick visit.

That didn't sound like much, but this was a _Prince of Hell_ demanding access to _Heaven_ , the holiest place in creation. The warrior Archangel really wasn't comfortable with the prospect of an Archdemon prancing around in Heaven. However, if he wanted this to get anywhere, he couldn't flat out refuse.

“I think I can arrange that”, he accommodated zir, “No promises though.”

“That's all I need to hear”, Asmodeus grinned with the confidence of someone who knew they had already won.

Michael nodded. “Right. If I manage to get approval from our Father, I will send you a permit via postage. Just … try to look less demonic, if you show up.”

The Archdemon laughed: “That's fine with me!”

The Archangel nodded affirmatively. “Good. I will take my leave then.”

Asmodeus nodded and gave him back his permit. “Shall I say hello to your ex-boyfriend?”

Michael tilted his head. “My ex-boyfriend …?”

“You mean Lucifer _wasn't_ your boyfriend back then?”

The Archangel stood up and headed for the door. “He wasn't.”

“Strange”, the Prince of Lust remarked. “I was under the impression, that you loved each other.”

Michael hesitated.

The problem was that Asmodeus wasn't wrong. But ze wasn't completely right either: they had never been a couple, but they had been in love. After Lucifer's betrayal, however …

“That was aeons ago. We never hooked up.”

“Oh. My bad. Then again, it's no surprise with his personality.”

“Not that fond of him, then? Raphael said you complain about him all the time.”

Ze pressed zir lips together. “As dutiful and obliged to him as I am, Lucifer is … _difficult_ to work with. Any more questions?”

“Actually, yes: Raphael told me you gained your position by killing your predecessor.”

“That I did.” Asmodeus smiled broadly and with relish, revealing razor sharp teeth. “And it was _exhilarating_! Then again, if the original Prince of Lust calls you a chimaera and you tear him apart in mid-air …”

“Oh my God.”

“That's exactly what Raphael said. Now go home, Michael. I will handle this affair from here. I assume you know where the exit is. Anything else?"

“Only one more thing: say hi to Luci-fuck next time you see him.”

The Prince of Lust gawked at the Archangel in disbelief. “Did you just …?!”

Then ze cackled hysterically: “Ohhhohoho! Michael! I'm shocked! You – ahahahaha! Luci-f-ahahaha! Ohohoho, this is priceless! Such language from _you_! Oh, I can't wait to see his face! This is fantastic! Can you say it again?”

Michael smirked: “What, Luci-fuck?”

That had the Archdemon laugh so hard that ze almost fell from zir chair.

“Goodbye, Asmodeus”, the Archangel chuckled, left and closed the office door behind himself.

As he left Hell and said goodbye to Abaddon, Michael felt so much lighter than he had before.

He sent a prayer to the All-merciful, before returning to Heaven and report the mission and its results to His Face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) In the Book of Tobit, Asmodeus plagues a girl named Sarah and kills her first seven husbands, before they can sleep with her. It's never stated, why ze does this. In the Testament of Solomon, Asmodeus tells Solomon that this is part of zir job. But it could also be that ze's obsessed with Sarah or acts as some kind of guard and kills the husbands, because they feel more lust than love for her (I think it's the obsession thing, as well as the job). Ze is later driven away by Tobias under the instructions of Archangel Raphael. Raphael pursues Asmodeus down to Egypt, binds zir and in some versions either imprisons zir in the Red Sea or strangles zir.  
> 2) Lilith was Adam's first companion, but she dumped him, grew wings and flew away, refusing to submit to him. God sent three angels, who asked her to return to Eden, but she refused and furthermore declared, that she would become a demon, who harms babies.  
> So God was like "Well, if you're gonna be like that, fine, but you'll lose 100 of your own children each day."  
> And Lilith was like "Fine."  
> (As ridiculous as this sounds, this is canon! The Alphabet of Ben-Sira also says, that she is driven away from babies by the names of the angels, who spoke to her)  
> Bonus: I will not apologise for the "Luci-fuck" pun. :P


	5. A heart-to-heart with God

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael reports to God about how his descend into Hell went and God answers a few of his questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning:  
> This contains the god of the Abrahamic religions being talked to in a familiar manner, as well as a rough physical description of said god. If this isn't your cup of tea, skip this chapter.  
> I'm agnostic and not religious, but I have a vivid imagination. As I wrote before, it's just a rough description of how I would envision YHWH to look like, as I could never put it into writing, nor am I talented enough to draw it.

You couldn't speak to God without going through Metatron first.

But Michael just got to greet the Scribe, before the latter pointed to the massive silver archway behind himself.

“Our Lord is already expecting you, Archangel Michael.”

“Right”, Michael mumbled and walked through the archway.

Stepping through the archway into the Throne Room of God was always an experience. One had to walk through what seemed like a planetarium rather than a hallway for minutes, before actually getting to … another archway, this one of gold.

Michael hesitated to cross this one.

Then the most beautiful of voices called to him: _**“Michael … come in, my child.”**_

Now he entered.

The light that assaulted his eyes would have blinded any other being than an Archangel or Seraph.

The Throne Room of God looked differently every time Michael came here. Sometimes it didn't even look like a throne room at all. Just like now: instead of on a throne, the Almighty was sitting in a worn-out armchair, among endless piles of books and scrolls, behind an ebony table. But instead of by a fire, the room was illuminated by God's blinding light.

Like the clearest echo, the singing of the Seraphim choir sounded through space.

“Lord God Almighty”, Michael greeted the Creator and fell onto his knees.

“ _ **Hello, my child. Come here”**_ , the Almighty beckoned and pointed to the smaller seat on the other side of the table. _**“Have a seat.”**_

The Archangel did so, keeping his glance lowered in reverence.

Being so close to God, to feel His unlimited power was overwhelming, even for the most powerful and high-ranking angels.

“ _ **You can look me in the face, you know”**_ , the Most High spoke with a hint of amusement. _**“My light has never blinded you and it never will.”**_

Michael would never understand, how he could look the Lord into the eyes without being reduced to a bawling mess, like most other angels. Those eyes, all-knowing and infinite like the entity they belonged to. And they were sparkling with merriment.

“ _ **My dear child, you're always so tense, when you come here”**_ , He chided Michael.

The Archangel couldn't help but smile. “Well, I can hardly waltz in here Lucifer style and act like I'm not speaking to an omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent entity, who created literally everything in existence now, can I?”

God laughed quietly: _**“No, Michael. You know better than that. But here and now, I will be your father. Have some cocoa, my child. And tell me, how your mission went.”**_

Michael felt a little embarrassed, but he recounted everything that had happened.

“I nearly messed it up”, he admitted sheepishly. “Most humans are more diplomatic than I was back there, not to mention Gabriel. I will never be as good at this as he is.”

The Almighty smiled: _**“You're not meant to be 'as good at this as Gabriel'. You're meant to be as good as**_ **you** _ **. And for the first time you did well. You rectified your slip-ups, listened to zir point of view, tried to understand it and offered a solution. You used your kindness and zir pride and concerns to come to a mutual agreement. This situation required initiative and you took it, like the sensible person you are. There is no reason for embarrassment.”**_

But the Archangel still wasn't convinced. “I promised zir to arrange a visit. Here in Heaven. Without speaking to you first, my Lord.”

“ _ **Alright, maybe that was a little cheeky”**_ , God chuckled. _**“Remember for the next time not to make promises too soon. Asmodeus knows that I can't say no now, even though you only promised zir to try. But it's forgiven, Michael. Let zir visit Heaven. And don't worry about conduct. Asmodeus may be one of the most evil people in Hell, but ze has a desire for self-preservation. Besides, that little pun of yours just put you into zir good graces – and yes, even Archdemons have those!”**_ God laughed. _**“I must say, this is the pettiest I have ever seen you! I will never get that pun out of my head!”**_

Michael smiled lopsidedly: “You don't get anything out of your head, King of Kings. Speaking of which … what about the demons? Do they remember Heaven?”

“ _ **Not all of them. But Lucifer, Beelzebub, Astaroth and Asmodeus remember everything, unlike the rest of my fallen children. It was for the best, that the rest shouldn't remember what they lost. Or that most of my children here shouldn't remember the bonds and love they once shared and the pain of losing their beloved fellow angels to pride and betrayal.”**_

Michael felt his heart crack.

“He … Lucifer remembers?”

God nodded. And for the first time those infinite eyes became sad. _**“Yes. Everything. He and the other three were the first to fall and the oldest of my children. Therefore I didn't erase their memories.”**_

Michael knew that he shouldn't ask further, but he couldn't help himself: “Do they … do they remember _love_?”

“ _ **They do. They try to forget, except for Asmodeus, but they do.”**_

Michael felt a particular spectre of the Lord's warmth caress his head: the healing love, which God once had given a shape in the form of Archangel Raphael.

“ _ **You are allowed to grief, my child”**_ , the Most High told him gently. _**“Don't keep it all to yourself. You have been strong for far too long now, Michael. You will never be able to let go, if you don't allow yourself to break. Sometimes you need to have the courage to be weak and vulnerable, in order to gain new strength.”**_

Those words broke him.

For the first time in aeons the mighty Archangel Michael wept.


	6. Long overdue talks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael opens up to Raphael, just a bit. Raphael finds out about the bargain Michael struck with Asmodeus.

“You looked changed”, Raphael remarked, when Michael came to check on him later. “Refreshed. Almost reborn.”

Michael smiled at him and Raphael knew that he was right.

“I do feel like it”, the warrior Archangel confirmed and hugged the smaller Archangel tightly. “Hey, can I tell you a secret?”

“Of course, Michael.”

“I think I can finally let go.”

Raphael understood and smiled gently. “I'm glad.”

He himself didn't remember much from before the Great War and that was probably for the better. But he knew that Michael did, that it always had pained him, that he had never been able to break the chains of the past.

“I loved him so much, Raphael. It was already painful to put my devotion to the Most High before my feelings for him and reject him. And then he betrayed our Father and Heaven … all this time I have carried this ache in my heart, building walls about myself and never talking about it. But when I talked to the Most High earlier, He told me that it's okay to hurt. He let me open up and it felt so good. I now know that Lucifer remembers me and what we once had, that he will never forgive me for choosing my duties and love for God over him and it will always hurt, but the certainty helps me, just a little.”

“You cried in front of God?”

“Yes.”

Raphael's smile widened: just when everyone began to suspect that the Most High was a detached, indifferent and distant creator, He reminded them all, that He was merciful, that He was there and that He loved His children, every single one.

“Other than your mission and Lucifer, what else did you two talk about?”, he asked curiously.

Michael laughed and let go of his sibling. “Nuh-uh!”, he scolded playfully. “Not telling! That is a matter between the Almighty and me.”

“Come oooon!”, Raphael whined. “I wanna know!”

But the older Archangel remained firm. “No, Raphael. I will not reveal what the Almighty revealed to me without His permission. Next time He summons you, ask Him yourself, you curious little angel.”

Raphael huffed, but nodded.

Of course Michael was right. Still he couldn't help but be curious.

“At least tell me about your meeting with Asmodeus! I'm dying to know how that went!”

Michael laughed sheepishly: “Well, I dropped a few bricks, but I think ze and I came to a solution we can both be content with.”

Raphael listened curiously to his older sibling's account of the meeting and laughed heartily at the sassy remarks the two had exchanged.

“By the way”, Michael finished awkwardly, “You might get a special visitor very soon.”

The smaller Archangel's eyes narrowed. “Michael … what did you do?”

Ten seconds later, all of Heaven could hear someone screaming …

“WHAAAAAAAAT???”


	7. The Prince's Wrath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asmodeus publically demonstrates what happens to people, who disobey zir AND touch what belongs to zir.  
> (tw: lots of violence and brutal murder)

In the Second Circle of Hell meanwhile, both the resident demons as well as the dead souls had not missed the rapid weather swings that had occurred, while the Archangel had been speaking to their Prince: from the normal storm, to a hailstorm unlike any seen on Earth, then back to hurricane force winds and then suddenly to almost mild winter weather, before a sudden temperature drop made everyone shiver and the ground freeze.

“Damn, Zir Highness sure is having a lot of mood swings today!”, an Incubus (the one, who had guided the Archangel Michael) noted and rubbed her clawed hands, until her body adjusted to the sudden temperature drop.

“Well, ze should stop, because I'm feeling dizzy!”, one of the older demons whined. “All these temperature swings make my circulatory system go haywire!”

“Demons don't get circulatory complaints!”, another scoffed. “Stop being such a pansy! This is literally Hell, we've been putting up with the weather around here for millennia and you're whining about circulatory complaints?!”

“Exactly!”, the Incubus agreed. “There are other things to worry about! Like what Zir Highness will do, when ze finds out about your hit on Raphael! Motherfucking Archangel Raphael, the guy who vanquished so many powerful demons, our Prince included! So what made you believe that _you_ could take him down, huh?!”

The first Fallen glared: “Shut your trap, you second generation demon!”

The Incubus narrowed her eyes. “Careful. Were my father to hear about your conduct towards me, ze would _not_ be pleased.”

Just as she had finished her sentence, one of the Prince's heralds came running.

“Orders from the Prince!”, he announced, “All demons of the Second Circle are to gather in the assembly hall at eleven am!”

All demons within hearing range dropped whatever they were doing and hurried to follow the summoning.

Within half an hour all demons in the circle had gathered in the hall and were chatting anxiously.

What could their Prince want?

Punctually at eleven am, the usher announced with a booming voice: “The King of the Second Circle, Archdemon of Lust, Prince of Hell, member of the Unholy Council of Seven, advisor of the King of Hell himself, Leader of Hell's army, Zir Highness Asmodeus!”

Everyone stood in reverence, as the Prince rode in on zir monstrous, winged lion.

“Hail Satan! Hail Satan!”, the millions of demons declared with one voice, as Asmodeus waved graciously. The Prince of Lust was sporting zir human form; voluptuous blonde with cherry lips and bright turquoise eyes.

That in itself wasn't bad.

But ze was also wearing zir robe of shadows beneath zir princely regalia. The room temperature was so low, that hoar frost was covering the walls and everyone quivered. The vibe the Prince was giving off was so sinister, that it made the lesser demons physically sick.

The message was clear: Asmodeus was furious.

Someone was going to die.

The Prince allowed a herald to help zir off zir terrible steed and slowly limped to zir own seat. A Succubus hurried to put a microphone right in front of their father's throne.

Asmodeus nodded towards zir child.

“Sit down”, ze spoke into the microphone and everybody sat. Then ze announced: “The following demons shall come hither before my throne.” And read out a list of names.

The demons in question obeyed, trembling even harder than the rest.

Their superior gave them a frigid glance, before ze bent forward and addressed zir subjects in a weirdly level tone.

“Creatures of the Second Circle of Hell. I have summoned you, because something has occurred, that was both surprising … and _impertinent_.”

There were murmurs all about and the tension grew thicker.

“Early this morning”, Asmodeus continued, “I had a visitor: the Archangel Michael. He came all the way to my office, because of an interesting incident. One that involved the demons kneeling in front of me and a few more: the wounding of the Archangel Raphael.”

Another murmur went through the crowd.

“It has been brought to my attention, that a group of thirty-one demons launched an ambush attack on the Archangel. And that one of them managed to wound him with a flaming throwing knife. As you all can see”, Asmodeus pointed at the demons in front of zir, “Only fifteen of them are kneeling before my throne. The other sixteen have been destroyed by Raphael, unsurprisingly.”

The murmuring died down and was replaced by subdued silence.

Only now ze addressed the demons before zir directly: “You fifteen are charged with indirect murder of fellow demons, unsanctioned assault and defiance of my authority. How do you plead?”

No one was surprised, when they pleaded not guilty.

Asmodeus did the biggest eye roll ever, before continuing: “I admit, the news caught me off-guard. Especially the fact, that it happened over a week ago and no one cared to inform me, until that cursed Archangel Michael waltzed into my office, armed to the teeth. Which displeases me more than a little. Now tell me”, Asmodeus turned to the demons before zir, “Who of you had the notion, that launching a surprise attack on an Archangel without my sanction or even knowledge would be a good idea?”

The demon on the far right put their arm up, shaking like a leaf.

Asmodeus tilted zir head in surprise. “ _You_? You are the instigator?”

The demon cowered under his superior's killer stare.

“So _you_ convinced thirty demons, that attacking a motherfucking Archangel was a brilliant plan? Impressive, I must say. But also inane. Surely you must have known, how suicidal such an endeavour would be. And he did destroy half of your gang, didn't he?”

Asmodeus' glowing eyes narrowed.

“Your little stunt cost the lives of seven of my children, as well as nine of your siblings. And to top it off, you dared to touch something that belongs to me. All of Hell knows, that I have staked a claim on the little Archangel and I have never taken kindly to anyone touching what's mine. And you didn't even get the job done: Raphael lives. He survived and told his siblings everything. Now the entirety of Heaven knows, which practically _forces_ me to make you face the consequences! But I won't punish you all the same. Children, step back.”

Three of the demons did as told, leaving twelve demons kneeling in front of Asmodeus' throne.

“For their lèse majesté, indirect murder of fellow demons, unsanctioned assault and disobedience, I sentence the twelve demons in front of me to-”

“What will it be?”, the instigator scoffed. “An eternity in Abaddon's Pit?”

The Prince chuckled frostily: “This fate _would_ await you, had you not pulled ten of my children into this. I lose a hundred of them to the forces of Heaven each day and no thanks to you now I have to mourn seven more. As it is, the Pit would be way too merciful. No. You will be devoured … _by my shadows_.”

The tendrils on the Archdemon's shadow robe extended and spread all over the ground. Everyone screamed in fear and scrambled onto their seats for a modicum of safety.

The Prince laughed, obviously enjoying the mass panic.

With deliberate slowness ze stood up and limped down the stairs to be at the demons' eye level. With a diabolic sneer ze let zir shadow slowly surround the convicts.

“Any last words?”

The demon to the far left lifted their hand.

“Yes?”

“Your Highness, may I take off my winter coat? It's brand new, I'd hate for it to get ruined.”

The Archdemon nodded.

“Too kind”, the lesser demon thanked zir (not without irony) and stripped out of their coat.

“Indeed so”, Asmodeus agreed and took the garment. “I must admit the dignity you face your gruesome execution with is admirable. Not that this is going to save you.”

With that, the Prince's shadow fully engulfed and consumed the lesser demon completely. They didn't even scream, as they died.

The audience groaned as one, shaken at the sight.

And Asmodeus _had_ been kind; ze had granted them a quick death as a nod to their bravery.

The other eleven on the other hand screamed hysterically and huddled together in mortal terror. Several of them fell onto their knees, wringing their hands.

“NO!!! MERCY!!!”

Asmodeus scoffed: “ _Mercy_? Here in Hell? Have you forgot that this is a place of punishment?”

“N-no, but-”

“Unbelievable! You went against my orders and have the nerve to beg me for _mercy_? Disgusting.”

“Y-your Royal Highness! D-don't do this! We didn't mean – we only wanted to-”

“Wanted to do what?”, Asmodeus cut them off. “Serve to your Prince the head of zir nemesis on a silver plate? In the hope, that you would gain my favour and be rewarded? Congratulations, you accomplished the opposite.”

The second one was torn apart and consumed with far more brutality than the first and blood spilled everywhere like in a splatter movie.

Not just a few witnesses screamed in horror.

The ten condemned remaining scrambled together even closer. They tried to run, alone the Archdemon's will held them where they were.

Asmodeus on the other hand seemed to be downright delighted by their terror.

“Is there anything else you might want to say, before I destroy the rest of you?”

A short demon managed to stand back up and screamed at zir: “WE ONLY WANTED TO PROVE OUR LOYALTY!”

“There would've been other ways of doing that”, Asmodeus informed them amiably. “But as it is, the only thing you proved is your folly-”

“I DON'T WANT TO DIE!”

“So?”

“WE THOUGHT IT WOULD PLEASE YOU!”

As their dying screams tore through the air and gore splattered everywhere, the Archdemon's cherry lips twisted upward. On zir beautiful human face it looked even more terrifying than on zir grotesque demonic visage.

Asmodeus _smiled_.

“You misjudged me, I'm afraid.”


	8. A parental scolding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asmodeus is a disappointed demonic parent.

“Now that this is done”, the Prince of Lust purred sweetly. “I think I got my point across. I never want to see such insubordination again, do you all hear me?”

The audience nodded collectively.

One by one they came down from their chairs, as their Prince's shadow retracted and returned to being the fringes on zir black robe.

“Good. Now to you, my children. Come here.”

The three obeyed hesitantly.

Asmodeus felt just a little sorry for terrifying zir children so, but drastic times required drastic measures.

“As your loving father, I will spare you this gruesome fate”, ze soothed them.

The Succubi sighed in relief.

“However”, ze continued sternly and they tensed up again, “That doesn't change the fact, that you have been very irresponsible by getting involved in this. So often I have warned you against the Archangels. They are way out of your league. Only a Prince of Hell like myself can hold their own against them. Yet you tried to mess with one anyway and seven of your siblings paid the price. That was foolish and I thought I raised you better than that. I am heavily disappointed in you.”

They lowered their heads.

“Now that you have seen your siblings die and just witnessed the brutal execution of my fellow Fallen, you will live with your survivor's guilt. You're grounded for the next two hundred years. In the meantime you will be cleaning the stables, including that of my dragon-lion Lyssa¹. You will also be feeding her. That's your punishment. And mind you, next time I won't be so generous anymore.”

They stared at their father in horror.

Normally Lyssa was fed normal meat like any other lion, but once Asmodeus had fed two demons from the Third Circle to her, because of some disrespect.

It had put zir at odds with Beelzebub for a while, but they had reconciled quickly.

Both of them were vicious, when it came to punishing the slightest signs of rebellion; they'd destroy first and ask questions later. After all, you couldn't be a Prince of Hell, if you weren't a special kind of ruthless.

Asmodeus sighed, shook zir head and miracled cleaning supplies out of thin-air. “Now clean up this mess, you three. And then you will make a shroud for your fallen siblings. I do hope you have learned your lesson.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) The Dictionnaire Infernal by Collin de Plancy states, that Asmodeus rides a lion with the wings and neck of a dragon. I decided to name her Lyssa, after the ancient Greek personification of furious anger, as another nod to Asmodeus' wrathful aspect.


	9. So we meet again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asmodeus shows up in Heaven and the Archangels argue.

Michael, ever the protective sibling, was anxious about the sanctioned, but very much unwelcome sickbed visit Raphael was going to receive soon.

Sure, God had assured him that Asmodeus would not harm Raphael and he had full trust in the Almighty, but he couldn't help it!

He wasn't the only one; in fact, Uriel and Gabriel seemed to be even more nervous about it.

Uriel had been incensed at the news and had nearly thrown hands with him. Not that they would've stood a chance against the warrior Archangel, but Michael wasn't one to look for a fight.

Finally the three were pulled aside by Azrael.

“How much longer do you intend to skulk around Raphael's quarters?”, she confronted them.

“Well, how can _you_ be so calm about it?”, Uriel snapped. “This is about Asmodeus, a motherfucking Prince of Hell-”

“Language!”, Michael scolded.

Uriel glared at him and went on: “-Raphael's oldest nemesis, coming to Heaven, the most hallowed place in Creation, and you're telling us to _settle down_?!”

“The Most High sanctioned it”, Azrael returned calmly. “You're fools to worry, when our Father agreed to let zir come here.”

“But-”

“Do not question God's decisions.”

The warning glance in the older Archangel's silvery eyes silenced Uriel instantly.

Azrael was paragon of patience, always calm and never rash, accustomed to waiting and able to tolerate almost anything without even arching a brow. But where the Almighty's decisions were questioned, she was quick to warn her fellow angels from treading onto potentially dangerous paths.

The Angel of Death sighed: “We have nothing to fear from Asmodeus. Not here in Heaven. The holiness of this place will take a toll on zir, so ze will seek to leave as soon ze's said zir say.”

Uriel nodded and humbly lowered their head. “Of course, you're right. I need to calm down. Raphael can take care of himself, even in his recovery and Asmodeus isn't stupid enough to attack him here. There just is something about their relationship, that unsettles me.”

“Well, our relationship _is_ pretty unsettling!”, a voice snickered. “But that's what makes it fun!”

The Archangels whirled around to look at the newcomer and their eyes widened in shock.

Asmodeus smirked: “Hello, everyone. Michael told me to try and look 'less demonic', when I showed up. So I did! Do you like my getup?”

The Prince of Lust was clad all in white, the long golden hair in a loose plait. Ze almost looked like an innocent young woman. Only the blackened, fractured halo and the sly look in zir bright turquoise eyes gave zir away. And the walking cane, obviously; it was practically one of the Archdemon's signature features.

Asmodeus arched an eyebrow. “What, won't you say hello? Do angels these days think they're too good for basic politeness?”

“Hello, Asmodeus”, Uriel said coolly.

The demon smiled amiably: “That's more like it! So good to see you all again! How long has it been? Michael's recent visit not counted, several millennia?”

The Archangels exchanged uncomfortable glances. Such genial conduct from a Prince of Hell was … jarring. To say the least.

But then the Archdemon squinted. “Wait … Azrael, is that _you_?! Why, I almost didn't recognise you! So _you're_ the new Angel of Death?”

Azrael nodded. “Yes. Death chose me to be her new vessel, after her old one fell.”

“I can see that, honey, look at you! I simply can't believe how tall you've gotten! And you're an _Archangel_! Nothing like the tiny, snow white Cherub, whose wings just wouldn't grow!”

Michael cleared his throat: “I don't want to be rude, but didn't you say you wanted to visit Raphael?”

Asmodeus laughed: “Of course! But I just couldn't resist catching up with God's little helper¹! My, how she has changed! Unlike _you_ three. You haven't changed at all”, ze added pointedly. “And neither has Heaven, apparently. It's just as cold, white and sterile as I remember. No wonder the silly little Archangel prefers to spend time on Earth. Speaking of him, where were his quarters again? My memory is a bit blurry on that part and I couldn't find a site map.”

Gabriel gave zir directions.

Asmodeus smiled suavely: “Thank you.”

Then ze limped off to Raphael's rooms.

The other Archangels, save Azrael, hatefully glared after the demon.

“Fucking arsehole!”, Uriel hissed.

“Language!”, Michael scolded.

“But it's true!”, they enraged themselves. “' _Silly_ _little Archangel_ '?! And reminding Azrael of the handicap she used to have! If this wasn't a holy place I would break zir spine! I will not stand for this behaviour!”

“Yes, you will, Uriel”, Michael ordered harshly and grabbed them by the arm, before they could run after the demon. “You will keep your temper and you will be friendly and prudent, like the Archangel of Wisdom you're supposed to be. Do you hear me?”

Suddenly he realised just _what_ he was doing and let go.

“Oh – oh good Lord God Almighty, I'm so sorry! Please forgive me, I didn't mean – I'm sorry, Uriel.”

Uriel rubbed their arm (it would probably bruise later) and averted their gaze. But the pain in their eyes hadn't gone unnoticed by the other Archangels.

Gabriel glowered at Michael, while Azrael shook her head in disappointment.

Michael sighed and hugged the white-haired Archangel. “Look, I'm sorry. I really am. That was cruel of me to say and do and I only shamed myself there.”

“Sure did!”, Gabriel grumbled and was promptly elbowed by Azrael.

“Mistakes have been made”, the Angel of Death spoke, “This one won't happen again.”

“Certainly not”, Michael promised.

Uriel still didn't say anything, but they did hug him back.

The warrior Archangel smiled, having all the answer he needed.

Azrael cleared her throat: “Now that this is settled, how about we put it behind us and I treat you all to a snack? Personally, I need a white chocolate moccha or something else that contains gross amounts of caffeine and sugar.”²

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) Azrael means "Help from God/God helps" in Hebrew.  
> 2) I've been inspired to this by the fact that I've stumbled over several entities of death/destruction in modern media, who have a fondness for human food. So my version of the Angel of Death loves sweet, hot beverages. God allows His angels to treat themselves once in a while, as long as it's not too self-indulgent.


	10. Sickbed visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asmodeus does Raphael a solid, while also being a massive asshole - you know, as demons are want to do, because this still isn't GO. Sorry, peeps.

Raphael heard steps outside his bedroom, put his book down and sat up in his bed, waiting.

Asmodeus didn't even knock before coming in.

The Archangel had to make a double take at how modestly the Prince of Lust was dressed.

“Hello, Raphael”, Asmodeus purred sensually, fully knowing how much Raphael hated it, when ze talked like that.

“Hi. Nice outfit”, he commented. “Loose plait and flowers in your hair? Long white skirt and blouse with frills? I'm impressed, you almost look cute.”

“And you look almost weak!”, Asmodeus retorted. “I've never seen you this fragile! If the cause had been me, I would be absolutely delighted.”

“What do you want?”, Raphael spat. “How did you get here and how can you even walk around here? The consecrated ground should be burning your feet and Heaven is too high up for demons to reach these days!”

Asmodeus shrugged: “These shoes are human-made. This way it only stings a little. As for how I got this far up, I hijacted a rocket."

"Asmodeus!"

"A ride, Raphael! I got a ride!", the demon groaned in annoyance. "Yerachmiel picked me up from Earth. Are you satisfied now?"

“No. Again, _why_ are you here?”

The Archdemon frowned: “Why so hostile, my beloved nemesis? I just want to make a sickbed visit to my revered adversary!”

Raphael's eyes narrowed. “No, you want to feast your eyes on seeing me vulnerable for once in your life.”

“That too!”, Asmodeus tittered. “But not just.”

Then, without even asking for permission, ze crossed the room and sat on the edge on the other's bed.

“I didn't allow you to invade my personal space.”

“I'm the Prince of Lust, silly little Archangel. Whatever makes you believe, that I give a damn about personal space?”

The Archangel was about to further sit up, but Asmodeus placed a hand on his chest.

“Now, now! Aren't you supposed to rest?”

“That's hardly possible with you around.”

The Prince of Lust snickered. Then zir grin slowly morphed into a leer, that made Raphael's flesh crawl.

“Look at you, Raphael. Bed-ridden and still weakened from an incident that was over a week ago. Absolutely _fantastic_. If being here in Heaven wasn't taking such a toll on me, I could sit here and revel in this sight all day.”

“But you can't. Lucky me.”

“Not so lucky”, Asmodeus contradicted. “You're at my mercy, more than you could ever care to admit.”

“Oh, I think I could”, Raphael replied. “I am in fact aware of how defenceless I am right now. I'm just not afraid of you.”

“Hmmm … maybe you should be”, the Archdemon mused.

Raphael gasped, when he felt the hand on his chest heat up. Then it wandered upwards, to his neck.

He choked, when those manicured fingers wrapped around his throat, painfully hot and threatening to suffocate him. He could feel the Hellfire crawling under Asmodeus' corporeal skin and the razor sharp claws beneath zir finger tips, more than ready to be unleashed onto their victim.

“I could kill you, Raphael”, ze purred. “Right here. Right now. Have my revenge and destroy you, just like I have always dreamed. I can _feel_ just how weak you still are. One blow and your siblings would return to find your charred, lifeless shell, your soul completely destroyed.”

Raphael grinned lopsidedly: “But you won't.”

Asmodeus snickered: “You're right, my fondly loathed. I won't.”

Still the Archangel was grateful, when the demon finally let go.

“Let me see your back”, the Prince demanded.

Raphael frowned at zir peremptory tone, but let his sleeping gown slide off the shoulders.

He suppressed a shudder, when he felt Asmodeus' hand running down his spine and stopping right where he had been stabbed recently.

“I see, they left a scar”, ze observed. “Must have been quite a potent weapon.”

“I think it was”, the Archangel mumbled. “I needed almost a whole week to drag myself back to Heaven.”

“I'm surprised you even lived that long”, Asmodeus noted. “Azrael and Michael didn't manage to remove all of it, did they? Some of it is still in there. If I don't remove the rest, it will kill you sooner or later. Like a slow poison.”

This time he did tremble.

Because this thought _did_ frighten him.

And trying to conceal it was futile; demons could sense fear.

Thankfully, Asmodeus didn't comment on it.

Suddenly the Prince applied a little pressure on the scar, making the Archangel gasp.

“I will drain the last bit of unholy essence out of you now. So brace yourself”, ze breathed into his ear. “Because this is going to hurt. A lot.”

Raphael gulped heavily and did as told.

But even the warning couldn't have prepared him for the sudden, searing hot pain in his back. It was similar to when he had been stabbed, but even more intense than that – it felt like the Archdemon's claws were digging into his flesh!

When ze brushed over a particularly sensitive spot, he screamed in agony.

Asmodeus snickered into his ear and the Archangel felt anger well up in his chest; of course that bastard was enjoying this! Surely ze was taking zir time to make him suffer as much as possible!

After a while, he finally felt something being drained out of him and for a moment it hurt even worse.

Then, before Raphael knew it, the pain was gone and he collapsed into Asmodeus' arms, trembling and gasping for breath.

“There, there”, the Prince cooed and embraced him from behind with one arm. “All better already. That wasn't so bad now, was it?”

“Not so bad?!”, he gasped. “It was worse than when I got stabbed! What in Heaven did you do, sink your claws into my corporation and dig around in my flesh?!”

The Archdemon chuckled: “Felt like it, didn't it? But no, my dearly detested. Exorcising Hellfire is just that painful – at least for humans and angels. But worry not, it's inside of me, where it belongs.”

“You drew this out”, Raphael accused zir. “And revelled in my agony, like the sadist you are.”

Asmodeus smirked diabolically: “And you deserved every second of it. Oh don't make that face, Archangel”, ze added, when Raphael glowered up at zir. “Need I remind you of all the things _you_ did to _me_ in the past? And now you have smitten seven of my children. Their stunt was the epitome of stupid, but that's not the point. The point is, no one has more right to make you suffer than myself.”

Raphael wound himself out of zir arms and readjusted his sleeping gown.

“Why do you always act like getting tormented by you is a privilege?!”, he demanded to know.

The Archdemon chuckled: “Oh, I have many reasons! I'm a Prince of Hell, making people suffer is fun and most of all … _you belong to me_.”

Raphael's eyes grew hard. “I'm not your property, Asmodeus.”

“Oh, you keep telling yourself that, silly little Archangel! But I have claimed you and there is nothing you can do about it. If anyone but me dares to lay hand on you, I will let them see the worst side of me. My wife knows this, the other Princes know this and thanks to what I did to the culprits, the rest of Hell now knows too.”

Oh no.

“Asmodeus … what did you do to the survivors?”

“Oh, I killed them!”, ze said cheerfully. “They got ripped apart in mid-air and consumed by my shadows! Except for my surviving children, naturally – they just got manual labour and house arrest. And the entirety of my Circle witnessed it! After all, I had to make an example on the demons who dared to act against my orders. Oh, you should have seen it! More than three million demons, completely horrified, scrambling onto their chairs to get away from my shadow, blood and goo everywhere-”

“Please stop. I neither need nor want to hear the gory details.”

The Prince pouted. “You're such a killjoy!”

“There is nothing joyous in what you do.”

“Okay, rude! Ah, whatever, I still have a lot to tell you. And I want you to listen, because this is important.”

Before the Archangel could reply, Asmodeus' hand returned to his throat – what was that with zir sick obsession of choking people?!

“Just to make this clear”, ze snarled, “Now that I have saved your life, you're in my debt. So you better prepare for the day, when I'll collect it. For a Healer, you get into far more trouble than is good for you. Still, I want the entirety of Hell, Heaven and Earth to know, that it is solely _my_ privilege to tempt, hurt or even kill you. You're _mine_ , Raphael. Always have been, always will be. Whether you like it or not. And you should be grateful, because that also means you're under my protection. Still you better not get into such a situation again, because if I have to save your pathetic arse one more time, I will torment you to the point where you'll _beg_ for death. Do you understand?”

The Archangel managed a little nod.

The Prince of Lust smiled – “Splendid!” – and let go.

Raphael coughed and gripped his own neck.

“Why the H-e-double-hockey-sticks do you always do this?!”, he rasped.

Asmodeus tilted zir head. “Why, whatever do you mean, my beloved nemesis?”

“Act like you're the only one who has some beef with me! Like you have a monopoly on being my enemy!”

 _Objectify me,_ others would have said, but Raphael knew Asmodeus too well. Ze was prideful and condescending and zir behaviour towards him often came across as objectifying, but he knew that the demon had a twisted, undefinable kind of respect for him that ze didn't have for any other angel or human. Even though Asmodeus' possessiveness towards him (that ze didn't exhibit over anyone else, not even zir wife and lover) was a more than dubious honour.

Asmodeus snickered: “Well, I wouldn't say I have a monopoly on being your enemy, but I definitely have one on being your nemesis. Azazel could escape his prison and I would still rip him to shreds, should he even attempt to harm you.”

“Wow, how very charming!”, the Archangel replied sarcastically, “Thank you! I'm touched!”

The Archdemon snorted. “Oh, you silly little Archangel! I love your sarcasm, it's just so … _unangelic_!”

Raphael scowled: “Leave, Asmodeus. Since you obviously have nothing more of importance to say, I will no longer put up with your taunting.”

Asmodeus chuckled: “As you wish. Not that I would've lingered much longer anyway. As I said before, being here in Heaven is pretty tough on me.”

_Oh, praise to the Almighty!_

“Oh, before I forget!”, ze cried and produced something from zir pocket. “I think this belongs to you?”

He blanched, when the Prince of Hell handed him a silver locket.

“How did you get your hands on this?!”, he croaked.

“One of your attackers snatched it, when they scrammed”, the Archdemon explained. “My children handed it over to me.”

The Archangel opened the locket to see, if anything was missing. But nothing was.

“The medallion of Yehudiel. The one she gifted to you, when you two got engaged.”

“How do you kn-”

“I'm surprised you still have it”, Asmodeus remarked. “After all this time.”

He clutched it to his chest, as he stared at the demon. “Asmodeus … what happened to her?”

“I don't know.”

It was a lie.

Tense silence fell over the two.

Eventually the Prince of Lust decided to show a little mercy. “Yehudiel is dead, silly little Archangel. That's all you need to know.”

So she had fallen.

Raphael wanted to ask zir, if ze knew who she was now, but Asmodeus clearly had no intention of answering that question. So he took it for now.

“Right … should you come across her, please say hello from me.”

Ze nodded. “I can do that.”

How strangely graceful.

The Prince of Lust stood with some effort and limped towards the door.

“Anyway … I will be on my way now. It was fun, my dearly detested. Say hi to your siblings from me, when you see them later.”

“Shall I say hi to Father from you too?”

For a moment Asmodeus lingered in the door frame.

“Do whatever you please. It doesn't matter to me. Goodbye, Raphael.”

Then ze was gone.


	11. Demonic marital love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lilith lends an ear to her spouse's complaints and has a plan to rid Asmodeus of zir frustration.  
> Here it gets a little lovey-dovey. I decided not to tag this as smut, because the sex scene isn't described.

With owlish eyes Lilith watched her husband pace up and down the room.

Asmodeus had been doing this for hours, venting zir frustration about zir nemesis and about how “unimaginably dense” he was.

Zir anger was causing a hurricane to rage in their Circle, so powerful it was leaking through to the bordering Circles. This had to be a new record – Asmodeus was notorious for affecting the weather in the Second Circle with zir moods and the angrier ze was, the colder and stormier it got. This power was only second to Beelzebub's; the right hand of Lucifer himself was renowned for zir weather aspect.

She was tempted to tell zir to calm down and stop rambling about Archangel Raphael, but she knew that ze needed to get it off zir chest.

Asmodeus was too proud to do this often, too proud to even talk about zir earlier existence. It would have come off as nostalgic and sentimental and Lilith knew that her husband was anything but.

“That idiot is driving me insane!”, Asmodeus fumed. “I mean, come on! I served him the truth on a silver plate! Nobody else, except for maybe the Almighty, even knew about the relationship between Raphael and Yehudiel, let alone that they wanted to get married and gave each other a locket as token!”

Of course Lilith knew that.

She also knew that ze possessed a medallion similar to the one ze had returned to the Archangel. It was the only remnant of zir earlier existence that ze had kept. (Which was a bit odd, because she knew that her husband had long moved on – ze had never been one to dwell in the past, ze was living for the moment. It was one of the things she loved about zir.)

And she knew, that her spouse had been tempted to keep the piece of jewellery, after their children had handed it over to zir.

“He remembers that – I _know_ he does! The shock on his face about me knowing this said it all! And he _still_ didn't get it?! How the fuck did he not get it?! How can one possibly be that dense?! This is a new level of dumbassery! Even a human would have figured it out!”

Lilith coughed softly.

Sure, she had renounced her humanity all these millennia ago, but that didn't change the fact, that at some point she had possessed it. Beelzebub still called her a “being of clay”, when ze felt particularly jealous; ze and Asmodeus were lovers in a way, yet it was _her_ Asmodeus had chosen to marry. Sometimes the Prince of Gluttony was still sour about it.

Her cough made her spouse stop dead in zir tracks.

“Do forgive me, my queen”, ze apologised. “That human remark was uncalled for.”

Lilith nodded gracefully.

Asmodeus tore at zir purple hair. “It's just … gha! How much more obvious could I possibly be?!”

“Maybe he does get it, deep down. Maybe he doesn't want to see the truth: that his fiancée has turned into one of the most vicious demons of Hell”, Lilith theorised, “I mean, if you suddenly turned back into an angel, I would flip my shit too. Probably be in denial as well. Because that wouldn't be the person I fell for and married. It wouldn't be _you_.”

Asmodeus smiled lopsidedly. “You're right, it wouldn't. While I remember everything, I can hardly believe, that I ever was _pure-hearted, kind and beautiful_. Not after more than six thousand years of being … _this_.”

Ze pointed at zirself.

Lilith tilted her head.

The King of Demons, as ze was also known, really wasn't beautiful by human, angelic or even demonic standards, at least not in zir current form.

Ze had three heads; one a black ram, one a black bull and a human one. The moon pale human face, a strange combination between beauty and hideous distortion: Asmodeus had very sharp cheek bones, purple lips, floating purple hair, razor sharp fangs and glacial turquoise eyes, that glowed red, when ze was passionate, enraged or upset. The Archdemon's androgynous body was covered in fluffy, black plumage and ze had the legs and feet of a bird of prey, lethal talons included. Not to mention the snake tale and the black hands with their long, clawed fingers. Then there were zir gigantic six wings, black-feathered with a pinkish hue and covered in eyeballs.

And this was just one of zir many shapes – some were even more frightening.

To Lilith her spouse was the most beautiful thing in the world, no matter what ze looked like.

She fluttered up (she just was so tiny next to zir) and gave zir a peck on the human-like cheek.

A light pink dusted Asmodeus' cheeks and ze giggled stupidly.

Cute.

Within seconds she found herself wrapped into zir wings and arms and they were cuddling.

“To me you're perfect, my husband”, she cooed, “No matter what you look like.”

“Oh, how I adore you so, my queen”, ze purred, “My soulmate, my perfect equal, best of all women and of all man- and demon-kind. You, who always let me be free and who is so perfectly suited for me. You, who won the heart of the Morningstar and still chose me.”

“My dear king”, she hooted quietly, “You, who could choose anyone as zir wife and wed a being of clay, who divorced two husbands. My very special person, who never treated me as anything less than zir equal, never asked me to submit to you and never laid chains on me.”

She took her human face to kiss her spouse on the lips.

Asmodeus kissed back with passion.

What followed was passionate lovemaking between two immensely powerful demons.

.

Meanwhile the demons and the dead sinners of the Second Circle noticed another rapid weather change, this time for the better.

“Ah, our Prince and his queen are fucking again”, one of the Fallen noted.

“Oh thank Satan!”, another sighed. “If anyone can soothe zir Highness's temper, it's Queen Lilith!”

“Let's hope this will last”, a Succubus remarked, “Father has been in such a measly mood lately, ze really needs to calm down and cheer up.”

.

“Whoa!”, Asmodeus gasped afterwards. “Six thousand years and still no one can sate my lust and make me see stars like you can!”

Lilith giggled: “Ditto, my dear!”

They lay like this for a bit longer, before the Prince of Lust noticed a cunning gleam in zir wife's owlish eyes.

“What are you plotting, my queen?”, ze smirked.

“Oh, I just had an idea!”, she tittered. “I think you should tell him flat-out the truth.”

Asmodeus caught on, but groaned: “Uuugh, way to bring Raphael into the afterglow, Lilith!”

“No, no, hear me out! Reveal yourself to him! Show him your fallen form! Don't you want to see the despair on his face, when he discovers, that his beloved fiancée is now his worst enemy?”

Oh.

Oh!

Ze beamed at her: “You're right! This would be … oh, so fantastic! The perfect revenge! Oh, the very thought turns me on again!”

The infanticidal owl demon cackled: “Alright, round ninety-nine it is!”

“Hell yeah!!”


	12. Uriel's advice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uriel gives Raphael good counsel on how to finally learn the truth.

After another day of bed rest, Raphael was finally allowed to resume his duties.

The other Archangels had been surprised, when he had given them the details of his nemesis' visit.

“So that's why the Almighty allowed Asmodeus to visit you!”, Uriel cried out, “I can't believe that didn't occur to me!”

“I told you all, God had a good reason to let this happen!”, Azrael proclaimed proudly, “But as usual you had to freak out, before thinking stuff over.”

Uriel rolled their eyes: “Yes, yes, I admit it, I overreacted and you were right about everything. Happy now?”

The Archangel of Death nodded in satisfaction. “Very.”

“Still kinda ironic, though”, Gabriel mused. “That Asmodeus would be the one to save Raphael's life. I mean, everybody knows that ze wants to murder him really, really hard.”

Raphael smiled lopsidedly: “That's true. But killing me here would have been suicidal. And Asmodeus loves zir life.”

“Speaking of zir”, Michael spoke up, “Do you happen to know, who ze used to be?”

Raphael shook his head. “No. And honestly, I never thought I needed that knowledge. But ever since ze gave me back my fiancée's gift, I'm starting to think … maybe I do need to know.”

Suddenly he had an idea.

“You guys remember everything or at least know, right? Can't you tell me?”

Everyone looked first at Michael, who shifted uncomfortably.

Then at Gabriel, who promptly turned away.

Azrael shrugged, even though she clearly knew.

It was Uriel, who gave in, but instead of answering his question, they just asked: “Raphael, why don't you just ask Asmodeus zirself?”

The Archangel of Healing huffed in exasperation: “I've already tried that several times, ze doesn't want to tell me anything! Ze didn't even give me a clear answer, when I asked zir what happened to Yehudiel!”

The other Archangels pricked up their ears.

“What did Asmodeus say?”, Michael wanted to know.

“' _Yehudiel is dead, silly little Archangel. That's all you need to know._ '”, Raphael parroted Asmodeus' sultry voice. “Gha! I hate how ze is always so flirty and forward, yet when it comes to zir past, ze always gets vague and elusive! I just have to mention it and ze gets either cagey or angry! The only thing I know about zir, is that ze was a Seraph and that ze was always close to Lucifer!”

The Healer sighed and flopped back onto his chair. “I'm sick of all this secrecy! I want to know the truth! Is that too much to ask?!”

The other Archangels exchanged even more awkward glances.

Finally Uriel took some pity on their sibling and pat his shoulder. “You know, Raphael … I think you should try one more time. Confront zir and this time be adamant about it. Don't let zir leave, before ze has told you everything. No matter how many temper tantrums ze throws, put your foot down. You're self-assertive, you can do that.”

Raphael beamed at the hoary Archangel: “You're right, Uriel! That's what I'll do!”

His mind was made up.

This time he wouldn't let Asmodeus get away, before ze had told him everything.

Because that wily arsehole had answers and Raphael wanted them.


End file.
